I was never totally sure I could do it. Until I did.

Whoa, get ready to smile like a proud parent over Julie's half-marathon success! I hope after reading this you're all ready to explore your limits, get outdoors, and connect with others who can help you not only during the hard times, but also share the good times. Congrats Julie!

September 17, 2012

Dear friends and family,

If the story ended with all peaches and cream that would be boring. So, between you and me, I'll tell you the real story. 

I ran my heart out; I ran 13.1 miles in my goal time of 2:00:04. 

This journey has been rewarding in every way possible. I started this adventure with a gut feeling, hope, desire, and idea and a new partner in Outdoor Mindset. I never considered running prior to this adventure. I always relied on the inside of a gym and a 45 minute work-out or in my former life a pool to stay in shape. You got a glimpse of a very personal side of my life, you started with me on this running adventure and getting outside and having an Outdoor Mindset and helping those with neurological disorders and stayed with me for 3 1/2 months until I ran a half marathon as I promised I would. I have to admit, I was never totally sure I could do it. Until I did.

I, we, raised over $7000.00 in honor of my Mom and the Remembering Robin ALS fund and have loads of people to thank for it. Family, friends, friends of friends, best friends and strangers that heard of the cause and wanted to help. So, I clearly raised awareness through the Outdoor Mindset blog and surpassed my monetary goal. Thank you all. 

Two amazing friends, Margaret Roscoe and Kourtney Matter surprised me and came to Sweden from the States the day before the big race. They are my right and left arms in life and this time they were my right and left legs. Kourtney was in the last 4 miles, I think, both my right and left legs as I was a hurting puppy and she made sure I got to that finish line at 2 hours. There is no way I would have done it without her there running. They are the best friends anyone could ask for.  

My husband has been my mental sanity and steady supporter for 3 1/2 months along with my kids when I started this adventure. I even got to hug them at the 12th Kilometer still smiling. And so many came out and cheered for me and Kourt on the race track. It wasn't until the 17th kilometer when digging deep was not a joke. And there in begins the aftermath, the reality for a first time runner going through this.

The race:

It was amazing. The weather was perfect. I mean truly perfect. I was telling someone, maybe you, that I was praying for great weather as I'm not really all that tough so I needed, wanted, hoped for the absolute perfect running conditions and got them. The race started. We took it out a little fast and felt good. Our goal was 2 hours. We were going to take it slow in the beginning to build reserves for later. But then we got cocky and wanted to catch up to the next heat in front us so we ran our hearts out. We felt fine. In fact I'd say we pretty much felt fine up until the 17th kilometer. Then we both started hurting. We started digging deep but we did stay on pace. Then I started to feel nauseaus around the same time. And a little delirious. It was waves of nausea, came and went, came and went and it didn't let up. My body was fine. Don't get me wrong, I hurt everywhere, my thighs, knees, mostly my knees actually, but it wasn't anything I couldn't get through. But my stomach. Not so much. Finally we rounded the final corner and saw that finish line. It was amazing. We crossed it, hugged and I haven't taken my medal off yet. Amazing, Kourtney was amazing - one tough runner, the buzz was amazing, the music, the crowd, the scene. I was relieved to be done. We walked to meet up with Erik, the kids and Margaret. We bypassed the massage booth and honestly I did it knowingly. I just wanted to get home.  

Dinner of Champions!

We hopped in the car and soon after getting home it came. Yup, full on dry heaving for 3 hours.  Thank goodness it was my best friends and husband who were seeing me in all my glory of dry heaving and not someone else. While Kourtney was jet lagged and just jumped in and ran and was fine - drinking Rose wine with Margaret, celebrating, having a grand ol' time. There was a party next door I was supposed to go to with all of my friends and just couldn't make it. All I wanted was to drink Champagne, celebrate with my husband and my two champion friends here from the states and party next door and I. Was. Sick. I had Marg google "nausea after running". Three things: 1) eating too much too close to the race (within 2 hours) That wasn't it. 2) dehydrated. I knew that wasn't it as I drank and drank and drank before and during the race. 3) drum roll...... Overexertion of the body. Bingo! That was it. I pushed my body past it's desired limit. I'm still a little mystified as I'm used to doing this. Back in my swimming days I did this daily. Well, I guess mama ain't 18 anymore. Well, I finally rallied later in the night and the only thing I could keep down was a bag of cheetos and a flat coke. I got to chat away with my friends and husband finally. At least I redeemed myself a little.

The lesson: I need to train my body it has to keep up with my mind and heart. Any ideas welcome. Cause I'm not backing down now. I will do this again. Save this space!

So there you have it. The full unabridged story in all it's glory. It was amazing, it was hard, I was sick and now I'm fine and I'm going to do it again.

I am blessed to have so many supporters that care about: my Mom and helping me fundraise for ALS research, Outdoor Mindset and what they aim to do now and in the future for all those living with neurological disorders and me during this journey. I am one lucky girl. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. 

I wasn't a runner so naturally I signed up for the Stockholm Half Marathon with a goal. And I'll do it again. My running, blogging, fundraising adventure has come to an end. The race is over and it's all done. I am wearing my medal and my Outdoor Mindset shirt with pride. I will no longer invade your in box or infiltrate your facebook pages with running clutter. Well, one more blog is coming out so I may peek my head in once more.

I hope you've enjoyed our journey together. I certainly have. Thanks for joining me in Remembering Robin. And you can always find me at www.outdoormindset.org. That journey for me has just begun.

Love,

Julie

Staying Centered

Tonight we have another chapter from Julie during her marathon training. This entry sheds a lot of light on the challenges and importance of being a Supporter of someone with a neurological challenge. At Outdoor Mindset, we understand this important role, which is why our Membership and programs are also for Supporters. Take is away, Julie:

Week of August 20, 2012 

Last night I went out for a run after my husband got home from work. It was a beautiful night and this is the most unbelievable place to run. This little town of Djursholm. By spring and summer there are running paths by the ocean, to the golf course, around town and by winter they are cross country skiing paths.

I saw a fellow trainer wearing the I'm Running for the Stockholm Marathon shirt. I felt cool, like I was in a club and she and I for a brief second knew we were in it together as we were running on the same path deep in the wood while seeing the water peeking out from between the trees. I was running as the sun was starting its descent. I felt like the animals were watching and guiding and helping me along. Does that sound weird? I feel weird having said it, but it's the truth. Maybe Outdoor Mindset is making me more outdoorsie after all. They are, after all, the guru's in helping all those people living with neurological diseases get out there and feel life, feel the elements, feel that they are not alone. The breeze, the smells of the dirt and leaves, the little chirping and scuttling of birds and other unidentified animals were all there talking to each other guiding me and my runner friend in those woods for that one stretch of path over 5 minutes or so. I'm not so outdoorsie but I was hoping for the rain to come. That would've rounded out my experience somehow. I talk to my mom out there, in my head of course. Not out loud. I don't listen to music, I like hearing the sounds around me and then I can also think a lot more and talk to Mom. Again, weird I know, but somehow it's comforting.

If only it was as easy as the push of a button...

I remember when she was sick I would go to the gym all the time. It was the way I let out energy and kept centered throughout her illness.  So, several years later, when I found Outdoor Mindset, I realized that they were in the process of creating something important; a community of people encouraging each other to use exercise to cope with the stress and the grief of caring for a friend or a loved one with a neurological disorder.  I saw immediately that OM was so aligned with my belief in exercise as an important coping tool; that their programs could be valuable tools for those fighting neurological disorders as well as those working through their grief.  So I decided to contact them and they matched me with a partner (across the globe, but close in life experience), encouraged me to find an outlet that was the most aligned with my needs (raising awareness and funding for ALS research) and continue to support me as I work towards my goals.

So, I run another day for you Mom, for me, for our family.  I run for all those living with a neurological disorder.  I'm thankful that Outdoor Mindset is out there with the hope of helping all of you affected by a neurological something.

Until next time,


Julie

Trying to Find the Silver Lining

So I'm not going to lie - when I sat down to put together tonight's blog (which is the second entry from Julie, our OM Member in Sweden who is training for a half marathon while matched up with another OM Member in CO also training for a race) I had a hard time seeing the silver lining in the reality of Julie's latest post. After reading and re-reading her powerful words, I came to the realization that the 'positive, smiley face, encouraging' silver lining of her story (which I always try to find) is that she's doing something about the horrible disease of ALS by raising awareness. And while she supported her mother in her years of ALS, she also did all she could, by finding hope. 

The other thing going through my mind as I write this tonight is the importance of Outdoor Mindset in connecting people affected by neurological challenges like ALS - to connect people affected by these tough experiences so that they can gain even more hope, solace, and understanding in what they are going through, or what they have gone through, or what they are about to go through. And while the advice may not always be easy or sugar-coated, there is a power in numbers and in connections for both awareness and for hope. 

You can donate to Julie's project here. 

Is that a silver lining I see on that cloud?

Here's Julie's second post on her half-marathon training: 

I'm out there running and the first thing I do is swallow a team of bugs... then I trip. Honestly. And this was going to be my first big run outside. An hour long run. What a way to start. The woosie in me wanted to forget it this time, turn around and drink a glass of wine outside on our new picnic table with my husband who just sat down to a lovely meal. The motivated me with my Mom's voice said, "don't be a woosie". So, continue I did.

Must. Raise. Awareness.

Can you imagine walking into a Doctor's office not knowing what is wrong with your legs and why they don't seem to be working exactly right? Knowing that something is just a little bit off and then walking out knowing you are on a downhill slide with no cure? No, I can't either. That's why I'm dedicated to raising awareness in order to help find a cure for ALS and put an end to this awful neurological disease.  

Mom was diagnosed with ALS early on but we didn't believe it. At all. We kept hope alive. My Mom and Dad saw multiple other doctors and finally found one that did have hope, which was rare. Looking back now it's clear to me that there seems to be two schools of thought when it comes to doctors and ALS. 

School of thought #1: This Dr will just diagnose it as they see it, it's matter of fact for them. They are Doctors and their purpose is to tell you what is ailing you. I guess there's nothing wrong with that. I'm sure there are ethical reasons behind a lot of it and sometimes those mega braniac Doctors just don't know how else to go about it. They just tell you the facts, tell you as it is, done. 

School of thought #2: This is the Doctor who is, as I like to call them, 'Humane Doctors', at least when it comes to ALS. They see the disease from a mile away but it doesn't benefit the patient if they know what it is and how their body will eventually start to go down a downward spiral - especially if it's early on. So this type of Doctor rules everything else out. They keep searching and testing for different treatment paths for the patient to take. They give you hope. 

So we found a nice, wicked smart, humane Doctor that likely knew it was ALS but did try and rule it out anyway. He was cutting edge, he knew his stuff, he had access to info, he was willing to spend time with us and just chat. He gave us hope and that we desperately needed and wanted. And when it's ALS you've got to want someone to convince you it's not. 

He's an MS specialist, but it's all in the head, right? Thank you Dr. Sadiq, for your hope, care and compassion.

We all knew deep down what it was. We finally resorted to admitting it and then the process began of letting that info sink in. Mom, you were superhuman. I remember she looked me in the eye as she was taking her electric wheelchair into the elevator and I was going towards the stairs and said, "Are you going to be ok with this?" My response was with as sturdy and strong a response as it could be and an utter lie so she didn't have to worry, "Yes". She entered the elevator and after the doors closed, I broke down in tears until I met her at the bottom of the elevator with a smile again. She was amazing. I put myself in her position now, at least I try mentally. I will forever learn from and admire her strength in all situations and especially her last test, ALS.

Thank you for reading again.

Julie

Going the distance....together.

13.1 miles is a long way to run. I've never tried to do it and am not sure I ever will (please don't challenge me). But with summer in full swing, it turns out that our OM Members are in full swing, as well, and are tackling some huge outdoor adventures together - like running marathons. Some people may think that a personal match made between two people on different sides of the world may be a bit hectic and unorthodox. However, we think when you have something in common as personal and important as being a supporter and caretaker of someone with ALS, it closes the distance and makes it feel like the other person is right there for every step of the next journey together - even if that is training and running a marathon. That's what Julie (in Sweden) and Jan (in Colorado) think, as well. But I'll let Julie fill you in on the rest and give you a bit more background... and stay tuned because there's more to come soon! ~Jill

Here's the full download from Julie: 

I am not a runner. I didn't even like to run.  So naturally I've signed up for the Stockholm Half Marathon on September 15, 2012. This is my story.

My mother died of ALS in Oct 2005. I was very involved in her life battling ALS, in general, but specifically while she was in her last few years combating the disease with strength and hope. Ever since then I've wanted to do something to help raise awareness and money towards a cure for ALS. First I needed to heal and step away from my personal experience for awhile. I needed to let my mind and body live life again - happily without worry, pain or fear of how my mom is doing that day and what I might face looking into her eyes but still needing to smile and laugh with super human strength. I come from a family rooted with love, good values and a foundation stronger than most. A family that has faced challenges, adversity and euphoric times; who's core has been shook but is strengthened by facing challenges head on and believing in positive energy, living a life that makes a difference. We believe it's how you live life that really matters.

So I fell in love, got married, moved to a few countries, worked, had a few kids and breathed fresh air again. I am proud of my two children and family, in love with my husband and love where life has brought me today - the journey and all. I am 37 years old and from New Jersey but now living in Djursholm, Sweden (a little town outside of Stockholm). As I was emersed on Facebook, I saw a friend's post about this wonderful organization called

Outdoor Mindset

. It's an organization who's mantra is: to unite and inspire people affected by neurological challenges through a common passion for the outdoors. It screamed my name and therein began the end of my search of figuring out how to raise awareness for ALS. I emmersed myself in the website and immediately signed up and reached out.

The road ahead... running!

Being that OM's mantra is uniting people affected by neurological challenges; they immediately connected me to another woman, Jan, who lost her Mom to ALS. Together Jan and I will be running in separate races across the globe from each other - she resides in Colorado, I in Sweden- to help raise awareness and funding together towards a cure for ALS. Please join us on

this blog

to follow our journey and get to know us on our mission to make a difference and find a cure for ALS. We will also be raising funds for the ALS Association on their website,

here

.

Now the best part is going to be following us on our path as we run in our separate races across the world while trying to raise money and awareness for ALS. We will share our emotions as caregivers and daughters of people with ALS. We hope to reach others affected by ALS or any neurological challenge on our blog. Oh, and there will likely a few belly aches and pains as we train and keep it real.

I'm not exactly a natural runner but I figured if my mom can endure a 5 year plus battle with ALS with superhuman strength, head on and with relentless hope then, well, I can run a half marathon. I hope. I thank goodness I have Jan, a natural and professional at my side helping me as she trains for her two races in August and October.

At least the view is nice in Sweden!

So I'm running. I'm running to support my fellow OM member Jan who's in CO running for the same reasons I am - our buddy support system.  I'm running for all of you living with ALS, for all of you with a loved one living with ALS, for all of you that have lost the battle to ALS, for all of you that know what ALS is and want to give it the big finger and for all of you that want to take the stairs but have to take the elevator because of ALS. I'm running for you, Dad, who would've gone to the poorhouse (and I think almost did) figuring out how to fight this disease for her with all of the homeopathic, holistic and cutting edge non-insured covered drugs and procedures with the hope of saving your love and soul mate. I'm running this for you Mom - my inspiration on how to fight and live large until the end.

Follow us along as we train. And if you're now intrigued, check out the

full Outdoor Mindset site

to understand all that this wonderful organization does to help people affected by a neurological challenge and why getting outdoors in any shape or form can heal. There are many ways to be involved. Perhaps you may want to join too?

~Julie